Six-Pack with Style – Heidenheim Gets the Full Bayer Treatment

If anyone thought Bayer 04 would coast into the Bundesliga weekend after that gritty Champions League win in Lisbon, well… they clearly haven’t been paying attention. This team doesn't just play football right now – it performs. And against Heidenheim, Leverkusen didn’t just win. They threw a six-goal party and forgot to send Heidenheim an invitation.

Within 30 minutes, it was 4:0. That’s not a match – that’s a warning. Patrik Schick opened the scoring faster than you can say "Werkself", and from there it was less a contest and more a showcase. Hofmann headed one in, Schick mopped up a loose ball like a pro, and Ernest Poku added some acrobatics for good measure. By halftime, poor Heidenheim probably just wanted to go home, but Bayer weren’t done yet.

Enter Ibrahim Maza. The teenager, who looks like he should still be doing his homework, played like a veteran and scored not once but twice – including a cheeky little poke for the 6:0. Not bad for your first Bundesliga brace. The fans? Rightfully losing their minds. The BayArena? Rocking like it's the 90s.

But before we book the Rathausbalkon for May: this was Heidenheim. Respectable side, sure – but not exactly known for spoiling parties. This kind of result is expected of a title contender. The way Leverkusen delivered it, though? That’s the scary part. Fluid, focused, ruthless. Like a Swiss watch, only more Spanish, Czech, Burkinabe, and Leverkusen.

Even the numbers got a bit silly. 926 completed passes – most by any team in the Bundesliga this season. Aleix Garcia played 165 of them himself, which is either an incredible athletic feat or a gentle mockery of Heidenheim’s pressing (or lack thereof). Tapsoba notched more assists in this one game than in his previous 166 Bundesliga appearances. Sometimes the stats just start laughing with you.

And let’s not forget debutant Alejo Sarco, the Argentine prospect who came on late and almost got in on the fun. A nice cherry on top of an already frothy football sundae.

So now, a break. The dreaded international pause, just when Bayer have found fifth gear. When they return, it's Wolfsburg away – and a run of games that could define the season.

But until then? We’ll just sit here, replaying goals, refreshing the table, and wondering: Is this actually happening? Is Bayer 04 really this good? Answer: Yes. And it’s a lot of fun.

Schick happens

Wednesday night in Lisbon, and Bayer 04 finally bags that elusive first Champions League win of the season. No fireworks, no samba football – but three gritty, glorious points that feel like aloe vera after the burn in Munich. Ugly? Absolutely. Deserved? You bet.

This wasn’t a game for the purists. It was trench warfare in football boots. Bayer didn't outplay Benfica – they outlasted them. Wave after wave of red shirts crashed into our backline, but the Werkself held firm. Special shoutout to Mark Flekken, who had the kind of night that goalkeepers write memoirs about. Benfica launched 21 shots – all of them found nothing but frustration and a Dutch wall in gloves.

And then came Patrik Schick. Off the bench, on the scoresheet, job done. His first effort was still more warm-up als goal attempt, but when the rebound floated onto his head, he did what a striker does – bury it. One touch of class, one-nil Leverkusen, and suddenly Lisbon went quiet.

Let’s be honest: it wasn’t pretty. But who needs pretty when you’ve got fight, sweat, and just enough Schick magic? With a starting eleven that’s young enough to be carded at every Kneipe in Germany, Bayer didn’t dazzle – they survived. And that’s what you sometimes need in Europe.

Even Malik Tillman made his comeback look routine after weeks out – the man stepped in like he’d just paused the game, not missed a month. It speaks volumes for the spirit Hjulmand’s squad is showing. They’re learning. Fast.

Yes, Benfica had more possession, more shots, more flair. Bayer had grit, guts – and the only number that matters: three points. It wasn’t a performance to frame, but it might just be a turning point.

889 Days of Sunshine – and Then Came Munich

Well, it had to happen sometime. Thirty-seven Bundesliga away games without a loss isn't exactly nature's default setting — and of course, when a streak of that magnitude ends, it does so in the most classic fashion: in Munich, against a Bayern side that decided to throw its lineup into the washing machine and still came out looking crisp. Meanwhile, our beloved Werkself apparently left the zipper of their defensive jacket wide open in the first half.

Three goals down by halftime — no amount of “but we had chances too” can smooth that over. Yes, we did. Echeverri had some electric moments early on that made you briefly wonder if Messi had been reincarnated into a teenage Argentine. But magic up front is pointless if the back line decides to cosplay as ghosts. Gnabry’s opener was as precise as it was simple. For the second, we defended with the structural integrity of wet cardboard. And the third? A classic own goal in the “shouldn’t happen, but of course it did” category.

Hjulmand was sportsmanlike about it — acknowledged the errors, pointed to issues with game management, and promised analysis. Fair enough. You don’t need to set the house on fire after one bad night. But the bitter truth remains: Bayern didn’t just beat us with goals, they beat us with control. 55% of duels won doesn’t mean much when you still concede three times before halftime.

Still, let’s not forget what just ended: a historic unbeaten run that will live in the record books — 889 days of Bundesliga away matches without defeat. That’s no small feat, and not something you scribble casually on a beer mat. Now it’s off to Lisbon, then Heidenheim at home — a prime chance to patch the ego and right the wrongs with some actual points.

Cup Chaos and Cardiac Football: Bayer's Midnight Madness in Paderborn

Just when you think you’ve seen it all in football, Bayer 04 shows up and whispers, “Hold my Kölsch.” That DFB-Pokal night in Paderborn had everything your football-addicted heart could ask for: tension, despair, euphoria.

Yes, we dominated possession. Yes, we passed the ball like we invented tiki-taka. And yes, somehow we still found ourselves 2:1 down in extra time — against a second-division side that played nearly half the match with ten men. Classic Pokal. Classic Bayer. Classic heartbreak incoming? Not quite.

Because this is the new Bayer 04. The Bayer that doesn’t fold, but finds extra fuel in the tank just when the warning light’s been blinking for an hour. Quansah pulled us back from the brink with a last-gasp equalizer before half-time of extra time — and then, right at the death, Ibrahim Maza decided to write his own fairy tale. 120+2, debut goal, limbs in the away end, and another chapter for the cult of "Last-Minute Leverkusen."

Let’s not kid ourselves though: it wasn’t pretty. Hjulmand’s press conference wasn’t full of high-fives and self-congratulations. Our pressing was off, our passing overly hopeful, and our game management… well, let’s just say we’ve seen sharper tools in the shed. But when you survive nights like this — mentally, physically, spiritually — you take the win, wrap it in bubble wrap, and pray it carries you through Munich and Lisbon.

And Maza? Remember the name. The kid’s been knocking for weeks, and now he’s kicked the door down. Maybe not ready to start every match yet — but definitely ready to turn one on its head in extra time.

So we move on. To Bayern, to Benfica, to wherever this wild ride takes us next. And if it ends with another last-minute winner? We’ll scream, we’ll suffer, and we’ll love every second of it. Because this is Bayer 04. And we don't do boring.

Two Goals, Zero Conceded, Full Confidence

What do you do after a Champions League defeat in Paris? Exactly: you give Freiburg a footballing headache. The Werkself bounced back on Sunday with a confidence you'd normally expect from a couple waltzing into the “Let’s Dance” final. A cool 2-0 against SC Freiburg, fourth league win in a row – and barely a drop of sweat on the forehead. Honestly, this wasn’t just a Bundesliga match. This was a statement. We’re back. As if Paris never happened.

Sure, Flekken had to save us twice early on – against his former club, no less – but once those nervous opening minutes were out of the way, Bayer did what Bayer does best: dominate possession, drain the opponent’s energy, strike clinically. One quick one-two between Garcia and Poku – bang, 1-0. One Grimaldo cross right on Tapsoba’s head – boom, 2-0. When goals look that easy, you know the team is in a groove.

Speaking of grooves – Ernest Poku is currently writing his own little football fairytale. Three goals in four games, and it’s not just the numbers – it’s the speed, the movement, the finishing touch. He’s becoming an integral part of this attack before our eyes. And Garcia? The guy must have a compass built into his boot. He’s pinging passes around that would make Google Maps jealous.

Garcia has become the heartbeat of this team. Tempo, vision, intelligence – he’s basically burned our entire possession playbook onto a CD and put it on loop. And when Tapsoba runs straight to assistant coach Meijer after scoring, it shows you something else: the vibe in this team is real. It’s not just about playing well – it’s about working hard for each other, too.

And Freiburg? Let’s be honest: they were never really in it. Sure, a bit of early pressure, but after the first goal, they were chasing shadows. Even if they’d had an extra man, it wouldn’t have changed much – instead, they ended up a man down when Lienhart saw a second yellow for fouling Maza in the 74th minute. From then on, it was just about seeing the game out.

Oh, and speaking of comebacks: Patrik Schick is back. Four weeks out injured, now back on the pitch. Didn’t score yet, but just seeing his name on the team sheet again felt like a small victory. When he’s fully sharp again, the goals will come.

Bottom line: mature, composed, professional. Not flashy, but highly effective. And the timing? Couldn’t be better. Now it’s off to Paderborn for the cup, and then it’s Bayern away. But with this Bayer team? Anything’s possible. No, we’re not getting cocky. Just confident. And as fans, we’re allowed to enjoy that ride.

Paris Pulled the Plug

There are defeats that hurt, and then there’s a 2–7 against Paris Saint-Germain. One of those nights when, as a Bayer fan, you start wishing the referee would just skip stoppage time out of mercy. The scoreline looks brutal—and yes, it really was that bad. A night to forget, but also one that brutally exposes the gap between “on the right path” and “on their level” in European football.

Of course, PSG are a juggernaut. Title holders, stacked with players who were probably born with a football glued to their feet. But that doesn’t explain everything. Because after a promising start, a missed penalty and an equalizer, Bayer 04 didn’t just lose the lead—they lost the plot. Three goals conceded in six minutes: that’s not brilliance from the opponent anymore, that’s collective collapse. Moments like that simply can’t happen at this level, even a man down.

Coach Kasper Hjulmand talks about “development” and “building a team” – and he’s right. But development only works if you’re honest about where the cracks are. Defensively, Leverkusen were miles off the pace. Everything that looked solid in Mainz—compactness, balance, discipline—disappeared against Paris. Add a few frayed nerves, and you get a scoreline that looks like a typo but isn’t.

Andrich’s red card was unlucky, but it also summed up the night: late, rash, unnecessary. PSG punished every mistake with surgical precision. Every turnover was an open invitation to dance on our misery. Aleix Garcia’s two goals, including a stunner from distance, were a small silver lining, but they don’t change the overall truth: we weren’t competitive.

The fans, though, were magnificent. Loud, loyal, defiant. You could feel that they understood what this team is trying to become. But maybe, just maybe, we fans also need to start demanding more than the comfort of “long-term process” speeches. This squad has quality, no doubt. What it lacks—still—is maturity in big games. Being brave isn’t enough on the Champions League stage; you also have to be street-smart.

The good news? The season doesn’t stop here. Freiburg in the Bundesliga and Paderborn in the cup are coming up fast. Those matches are the perfect chance to prove that lessons have been learned, not just noted in the post-match press conference. But that requires finding the pride that seemed to vanish somewhere around the 40th minute against Paris.

A 2–7 loss can be filed away, sure. But it shouldn’t be shrugged off. Because if you really want to belong among Europe’s elite, you have to endure nights like this—and respond to them the right way. Painful as it is, maybe this was the kind of reality check every “project” needs once in a while.

So, let’s take the punch, fix the fuse, and move on. After all, we’re Bayer 04: sometimes tragic, always passionate, never boring.

Terrier, Goals & Total Chaos: Mainz Tried, But Bayer 04 Had Other Plans

Well, well, well – look who just can’t stop winning away from home! Anyone thinking Bayer 04 would calmly tiptoe through the post-Union Berlin schedule clearly hasn’t been watching this team lately. The 4:3 win in Mainz? More like a rollercoaster ride through the MEWA Arena, complete with goals, drama, records, and the kind of chaos that makes you question if your heart is even built for this club anymore. But hey – who said being a Bayer fan was supposed to be relaxing?

Let’s be honest: that wasn’t just a Bundesliga match, it was a 90-minute mixtape of everything that currently makes this team so damn fun to watch. We had early goals, silky-smooth build-ups, an emotional comeback goal from Martin Terrier (who's been out so long that some fans thought he was a myth), and yet another Grimaldo masterclass. Sprinkle in a few defensive wobbles for dramatic effect, and you’ve got yourself a true Werkself thriller.

Sure, conceding three goals sounds like a red flag, but let’s not pretend we weren’t in control most of the time. Mainz did their part – aggressive, scrappy, and annoyingly persistent – but when you’ve got a team like ours clicking the way we are right now, it’s like bringing a butter knife to a laser battle.

And speaking of laser-sharp – Martin Terrier. Back on the pitch after nine months, and what does he do? He bags a goal like he never left. The man stepped onto the grass, found the net, and went straight into a group hug that probably should’ve been rated PG-13 for emotional intensity. It wasn’t just a nice moment – it was the kind of feel-good football that makes you believe in comeback stories, in physiotherapists, and maybe even in destiny.

Also back in the mix: Jonas Hofmann, quietly and efficiently doing what he does best – being clever, calm, and criminally underrated. His link-up play with Grimaldo on the left? Chef’s kiss. And let’s not forget Christian Kofane, who’s scoring in every game like he’s on a mission to get his own statue outside the BayArena by Christmas. Three goals in three games, and he’s still younger than half the people in your FIFA Ultimate Team squad.

But hey, don’t let all the goal-scorers distract you from Robert Andrich, now the proud owner of a Bundesliga record: 38 consecutive away games without defeat. That’s not just consistency – that’s elite road warrior energy. If the Bundesliga handed out frequent flyer miles, Andrich could probably book the whole squad a trip to Bali.

And let’s take a moment for **Grimaldo**, our Spanish engine who’s currently playing like he’s allergic to bad performances. Two more goals, more running than a marathon runner with caffeine issues, and – fun fact – he’s already outscored his total from last season. Leadership? Check. Goals? Check. Defending? Also check. Basically, he’s doing everything except selling bratwurst at halftime.

So yes, it got nervy at the end. Yes, Mainz got a bit too close for comfort. But we walked away with the three points, extended our unbeaten away run to a mind-boggling **37** league games, and proved once again that this team is not here to mess around.

Now, PSG is next. Champions League, bright lights, big names. And honestly? Let them come. Because right now, Bayer 04 look like a team that doesn’t care who’s standing on the other side – they’ll just outplay, outpass, and outscore them anyway.

Of course, here at neverchampions, we don’t throw around the M-word lightly. We know better. We’ve seen too much. But if this continues, we might need to start preparing a “Just in Case” emergency celebration kit – complete with confetti, a therapist, and a list of humble responses for interviews.

For now, though, it’s one step at a time – next stop: PSG. Bring snacks, bring nerves, and maybe bring a spare heart monitor. Because if there’s one thing we know by now, it’s this: boring just isn’t Bayer’s style anymore.